17 September, 2007

Mental Preparation

It’s 12:30am. I’m sitting in a dark room lit only by the familiar glow of the computer. My travel itinerary lies partially distinguishable in front of me. It has finally hit me that I am leaving in less than a week. (This would be the time to put… “for the journey of a lifetime,” but I just can’t bring myself to write that.) Right now more than anything, I need to say just how dreadfully scared I am of this “life experience” that is going to take me miles and miles away from my friends, family -old and new- and the familiar. So this will be my first Peace Corps post, for all of you interested in following my travels into the heart of South America.

I know these are just pre-departure jitters, and that when all is said and done, I’ll get on that plane. But it helps putting my reservations into words, because then they are just words and not debilitating feelings that seem to cut me off at the knees. I can’t help but think of everything I will miss, how this Erin will become somewhat of an apparition in people’s minds, even the minds of my loved ones. And of course I know I will be making new and exciting memories, growing and changing as a person. But realizing that becomes difficult for someone who is about to leave the life they know and love, a life they’ve become comfortable in, for an existence they hardly can imagine.

And now there’s something I need to say before I end this and head back to bed. I want all of the people who have supported me this far to know how much I truly appreciate your encouragement. There is no way I could have gotten this far with out you! And just knowing that you’ll be there for me emotionally once I’m in-country makes transitioning that much easier!

I vow to write as often as possible.
I promise to stay brief (I know you are all busy people)
And I will try my absolute to make all of you proud. I know I’m not just representing myself out there, I’m standing in for you too, and I pledge to do my best!

Cheers to all of you! Here I come, Paraguay!

4 comments:

Gary said...

I know you'll be a success in your endeavors and will be greatly appreciated by those you help. You are in my thoughts and prayers, Erin. Good luck to you and keep in touch when you can! I'll be following your adventures!

Lauren Fraracci said...

Wow! You got a nomination and all that jazz are are off on your way? That is amazing! I hope that your travels and work abroad will go smoothly and give you the challenge you are looking for! :) Best of luck!

lindsey said...

hey hey - one week! See you in Miami!

Anonymous said...

I think that you are the most amazing person Ive ever met. You have such strong courage to leave this life behind to make a difference in someone else's world. I will miss you and wish you all the best of luck.
~Kelly Thomas~